Unbelievable Winnemucca Getaway: Candlewood Suites Awaits!
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because we're diving deep into a review of… well, let’s just call it “The Fancy Pants Hotel” for now. This isn't your sterile, corporate-speak hotel review. This is the real deal, warts and all, from a semi-sane human. SEO be damned (kidding, kinda). Let's get messy!
First Impressions & Accessibility (and the Dreaded Elevator)
Okay, so the curb appeal's pretty darn good. Lush landscaping, gleaming entrance… you know, the drill. But let's talk accessibility, because it matters, and I’m going to be brutally honest.
- Wheelchair Accessible: Yep, seems to be. Ramps everywhere. Good sign! I didn’t actually use a wheelchair (thank the heavens!), but I poked around, and it looked good. Big doors, wide hallways… the works. Good. Moving on.
- Elevator: Ugh. This is where things get a little… complicated. It worked. Thank goodness. But it was slow. I'm talking, "Did I just age three years waiting for this thing?" slow. So, if you're in a hurry, or prone to claustrophobia, maybe take the stairs? Just saying…
- Facilities for Disabled Guests: Did I miss something? I don't know. I really should have checked this. I am sorry.
Internet: The Lifeline of Modern Existence (and the Lack Thereof in a Good Cup of Coffee)
- Free Wi-Fi in All Rooms! YES! Amen! Praise be to the internet gods! This is crucial, people. Especially when you're trying to order pizza at 3 AM. And yes, I was. Don't judge.
- Internet [LAN]: They have it. I think it’s a relic from the Stone Age of internet. Honestly, who uses LAN anymore? But hey, it's there. Just in case you have, like, a super-secret, government-grade laptop or something.
- Internet Services: They had it, it worked, which is all I ask.
- Wi-Fi in Public Areas: Fine. Standard. Nothing to write home about. Although, I did notice a group of tourists huddled around the lobby, practically chained to their phones. Cute. I mean, the Wi-Fi was cute, not the people… (kidding!)
Things to Do, Ways to Relax (and My Near-Death Experience with the Sauna)
Alright, this is where The Fancy Pants Hotel tries to impress. And mostly, it does.
- Fitness Center: Decent. Treadmills, weights, the usual. Nothing groundbreaking, but gets the job done. I attempted to use it once. Let’s just say, I'm not a morning person, and the elliptical and I had a disagreement. I lost.
- Swimming pool: Yes. Outdoor. Gorgeous view. I actually swam in it. It was… surprisingly cold. But beautiful. The pool boy was quite the looker.
- Pool with view: Absolutely. The view was the best part. City lights twinkling at night. Romantic, even, if you're into that sort of thing. (I'm not, obviously. Wink.)
- Spa: Ah, the spa…This is where things got interesting.
- Sauna: This is not the place to be if you're claustrophobic. It's small, and it gets hot. And I mean, hot. I thought I was going to spontaneously combust. I escaped just in time!
- Steamroom: No, thank you!
- Massage: I did get the massage. Yes. A full body massage. Let me tell you, it was amazing. I nearly fell asleep and snored.
- Body scrub: I didn’t get this.
- Body wrap: I didn’t get this.
- For the Kids: Babysitting service is available. I did not see the kids facilities.
- Things to do: I explored the surroundings, and other than my trip to the gym, was a lazy traveler.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking (and the Restaurant That Almost Broke Me)
Okay, food. This is where a hotel can really shine… or utterly fail.
- Restaurants: There are several. Including Asian, Western cuisine.
- Bar: Yes. A rather swanky bar.
- Breakfast:
- Breakfast [buffet]: Huge. Everything you could possibly want. But, and this is a big but, the sheer volume of food was a little overwhelming. I mean, how many types of pastries does one human need?
- Breakfast takeaway service: Brilliant
- Asian breakfast: Available.
- Western breakfast: Also available.
- Room service [24-hour]: Essential. Especially for those 3 AM pizza emergencies.
- Coffee shop: Present. I got a coffee. It was okay. I've had better.
- Snack bar: Present.
- Desserts in restaurant: I did get dessert. Really, really good.
Cleanliness and Safety (and the Slightly Overzealous Sanitization)
Let’s be real, we’re all a little germ-obsessed these days. How did The Fancy Pants Hotel fare?
- Anti-viral cleaning products: Check.
- Daily disinfection in common areas: Check.
- Hand sanitizer: Everywhere. Literally everywhere.
- Room sanitization opt-out available: Check. (Thank goodness)
- Rooms sanitized between stays: Check.
- Safe dining setup: Check.
- Staff trained in safety protocol: Check.
- Masks: I didn't see any.
- Physical distancing of at least 1 meter: Mostly enforced.
I felt very safe. Maybe too safe? I mean, I wouldn't object to the amount of sanitizing products.
Services and Conveniences (and the Slightly Overenthusiastic Concierge)
- Concierge: Very helpful, albeit a little… overenthusiastic.
- Daily housekeeping: Fantastic. My room always looked pristine.
- Elevator: Again, slow.
- Cash withdrawal: Nope.
- Currency exchange: Yes. The hotel's currency exchange charges a high commission.
- Doorman: Yes!
- Dry cleaning: Yes.
- Food delivery: Yes.
- Gift/souvenir shop: Yes.
- Ironing service: Yes.
- Laundry service: Yes.
- Luggage storage: Yes.
- Safety deposit boxes: Yes.
- Smoking area: Yes.
- Air conditioning in public area: Yes.
- Facilities for disabled guests: Yes.
- Facilities for disabled guests: Yes.
Available in all rooms: A Roomful of… Stuff
- Air conditioning: Essential. Especially if you accidentally set the sauna on auto-pilot (ahem).
- Alarm clock: It worked.
- Bathrobes: Soft.
- Bathtub: Yes.
- Blackout curtains: Necessary. For sleeping in.
- Closet: Spacious.
- Coffee/tea maker: Needed.
- Complimentary tea: Needed.
- Daily housekeeping: Fantastic.
- Desk: Spacious and functional.
- Extra long bed: Good for stretching out and contemplating life.
- Free bottled water: Always welcome.
- Hair dryer: Essential.
- High floor: I had a great view.
- In-room safe box: Used it.
- In-room safe box: Used it..
- Interconnecting room(s) available: I didn't see any.
- Internet access – wireless: Brilliant.
- Ironing facilities: Useful.
- Laptop workspace: Yes
- Linens: Soft and clean.
- Mini bar: Stocked. Expensive.
- Mirror: Present.
- Non-smoking: Yes.
- On-demand movies: They had them.
- Private bathroom: Essential.
- Reading light: Good for reading.
- Refrigerator: Handy.
- Satellite/cable channels: Yes.
- Scale: I didn't jump on it.
- Seating area: Comfy.
- Separate shower/bathtub: Luxurious.
- Shower: Worked.
- Slippers: Comfy.
- Smoke detector: Present.
- Socket near the bed: Yes.
- Sofa: Comfy.
- Soundproofing: Good!
- Telephone: Present.
- Toiletries: High quality.
Okay, buckle up, buttercup, because this isn't your grandma's itinerary. This is Winnemucca, Nevada, through the bleary-eyed gaze of someone who's probably going to need a nap by the end of it. And, let's be honest, it all starts with the Candlewood Suites. It's not exactly the Ritz, but hey, it's got a kitchenette and free Wi-Fi, so I'm already a winner.
Day 1: Arrival, Desert Dust, and Questionable Choices
- ~10:00 AM (ish): FINALLY! Arrive at Reno-Tahoe International Airport. Okay, so the rental car situation was a MESS. Apparently, "compact" means "barely bigger than a go-kart." Road trip, here we go! And hey, at least the drive to Winnemucca is supposed to be scenic, right? (Narrator: It wasn't.)
- ~12:30 PM: The drive, oh the drive! I swear, the Nevada desert is just… brown. And straight. So. Straight. My brain started to feel the same. By the time Winnemucca materialized on the horizon, I was pretty sure I'd seen every jackrabbit within a 50-mile radius.
- ~1:30 PM: Check-in at Candlewood Suites. Success! Okay, the lobby smells faintly of chlorine and stale coffee, but my room is… well, it’s functional. The fridge is definitely the size of a shoebox, but hey, beer chills, and that's what matters, right?
- ~2:00 PM: Unpack, collapse onto the surprisingly comfortable bed (it's the little victories, people), and… Ugh. I totally forgot the sunscreen. Desert sun plus pale skin equals… disaster.
- ~3:00 PM: Okay, time to face the music. Head out to explore. First stop: Winnemucca downtown. Well, it’s a little… quiet. Okay, REALLY quiet. Remember those Western movies? This feels exactly like that, except with more pickup trucks and less shootin' irons.
- ~4:00 PM: I stumble upon the Humboldt Museum. It's charmingly… eclectic. They have everything from Native American artifacts to a collection of antique kitchen appliances. I spent a solid 15 minutes staring at a spinning wheel, completely transfixed. Seriously, what did they do before electric mixers? The mind boggles.
- ~5:30 PM: The sun is starting to sink, and I think I'm gonna need a drink. Found a local bar called the "Vegas Club." Classic neon sign – I love it! It’s more locals than tourists but definitely not a bad place to be.
- ~7:00 PM: Dinner at the "Gold Country Inn". I ordered the ribeye. It was… passable. Let's just say it wouldn't win any culinary awards, but it filled a hole. I'm pretty sure the waitress knew everyone in town, by the way. The small-town feel is definitely a thing here.
- ~9:00 PM: Back at the Candlewood. Crack open a cold one and try to figure out what to do tomorrow. Maybe I'll check out the Winnemucca Sand Mountain Recreation Area. Sand dunes! Sounds… promising. If I'm feeling adventurous. (Narrator: Spoiler alert: she's not.)
Day 2: Gambling, Ghosts, and Possibly Regret
- ~8:00 AM: Wake up, regretting last night's decisions. That ribeye wasn't exactly a feather bed. Coffee from the (tiny) in-room coffee maker, which is surprisingly good.
- ~9:00 AM: Attempt to find a decent breakfast. McDonald's is the only option. It is what it is. Fuel up for the day.
- ~10:00 AM: Alright, I'm feeling brave! Time to take on the Winna-Mucka! (Yes, the locals call it that.) It's a slightly daunting building. I mean, it's just… there. But the thought of actually gambling makes me anxious like I'm gonna explode. I wander around looking at the slot machines with a detached curiosity.
- ~ 11:00 AM: I'm still not ready to gamble, but I think I can at least see a few games. I sit at the bar and have a Coke, watching the locals. It's quite interesting.
- ~12:30 PM: Lunch at a small cafe, a burger and fries. It's pretty good, all things considered. The waitress tells me about the local ghost tours, which I find myself strangely intrigued by.
- ~ 2:00 PM: Deciding to skip the Sand Mountain Recreation Area. Instead, I decide to do a little more exploring. Back into the car, and I start driving.
- ~ 3:00 PM: It's starting to get late, and I'm looking at the clock. I think I'll skip the ghost tour. I've done enough walking for the day, and I have a book to read.
- ~ 6:00 PM: Dinner at the… sigh… Gold Country Inn again. The ribeye is a little less… robust tonight. But I'm still tired.
- ~ 7:00 PM: Back at the Candlewood. I'm ready to rest.
- ~ 9:00 PM: Bed!
Day 3: The Road Home (and a Mild Existential Crisis)
- ~8:00 AM: Wake up, ready to go. The sun is out, and it's time to go.
- ~9:00 AM: I can't believe I didn't go to the Sand Mountain Recreation Area. I regret not even trying. I feel like I missed an experience.
- ~9:30 AM: Check out of Candlewood. Goodbye, little refrigerator. I'll miss you.
- ~10:00 AM: Hit the road. The drive back to Reno is… still brown. But I'm starting to appreciate the vastness of it all, you know? This trip has really forced me to slow down.
- ~1:00 PM: Drop off the rental car. Goodbye, "compact." I hope you find someone to love you for who you are.
- ~2:30 PM: At the Reno airport. Waiting for my flight. Reflecting on… everything.
- ~4:00 PM: Flight. Bye Winnemucca!
- ~6:00 PM: Home again, home again, jiggety-jig! Back to the real world.
- ~7:00 PM: Unpack, wash the desert dust out of my hair, and… yeah, I think I need another vacation. Maybe somewhere with more greenery. And less brown. But hey, at least I survived. And that, my friends, is a victory. Time for pizza and a long, hot bath. And maybe a stiff drink. This trip… it was something, all right. And now? A thousand memories I'll never forget. And that’s what counts.
This, my friends, is a real-life, messy, slightly absurd, and probably-too-honest-for-its-own-good itinerary. Remember: life's too short for boring trips. Embrace the weird, the unexpected, and the questionable food choices. You might just surprise yourself. And maybe, just maybe, you'll have a story to tell when you get back.
Escape to Paradise: Hotel Paraiso del Oso - Your Unforgettable Chihuahua Getaway
So, what *is* this "Stuff" we're talking about, exactly? It's vague.
Alright, alright, I see your point. "Stuff" is annoyingly broad, isn't it? Think of it as... anything and everything that's been swirling around in my brain recently. From the truly profound (like, what *is* the meaning of a perfectly toasted bagel?) to the utterly ridiculous (did I *really* leave my favorite socks at my ex's place? Again?). Think of it as a mental catch-all. It's less a curated collection and more a mental garage sale of thoughts. Expect the unexpected, my friend.
Okay, I'm slowly getting it. Are we going to talk about... experiences? Like, actual *things* that happened?
Oh, absolutely. Experiences, big and small. Let me tell you about the time I tried to bake a cake. I’m talking, like, the whole shebang, with buttercream frosting, the works. I’d seen it on a cooking show and thought, "How hard could it be?" Famous last words, right? I managed to set off the smoke alarm, almost lost a finger to the mixer (it was a *very* aggressive model), and the cake itself... well, let's just say it resembled something vaguely geological. Think a dense, brick-like substance with a suspiciously green hue. It tasted like despair looked. My dog, normally a bottomless pit of hunger, took one sniff and walked away, tail between his legs. That, my friends, was an *experience*. And it's the kind of experience that shapes a person.
Sounds... intense. What about opinions? Are you going to, you know, *have* any?
Honey, are you kidding? Opinions are practically my oxygen! But be warned: I'm not always right. In fact, I am frequently, hilariously wrong. I’ll tell you what's bugging me, what I love, what makes me want to scream into a pillow. Just don't expect a carefully crafted, objective viewpoint. I'm more of a "gut feeling and a whole lot of caffeine" kind of person. Like, I *hate* the way people pronounce "espresso"! It's "ess-PRESS-oh"! Not "ex-spress-oh"! Argh! Ok, take a deep breath. See? Opinions. They're real. And powerful.
Will there be any... regrets?
Regrets? My dear friend, regrets are the lifeblood of a life well-lived (or, at least, a life lived with a certain flamboyant level of chaos). I'm swimming in them. Like the time I dyed my hair green the week before a job interview. Or the time I tried to haggle for a used car and ended up looking like a complete idiot. Or the time I… okay, you get the idea. But hey, without regrets, what would we have to laugh about? Or, you know, learn from. Maybe. Sometimes. Look, I am working at it.
Are there any topics that are totally off-limits? Like, things you *won't* talk about?
Hmm, that's a tough one. I'm generally an open book. Probably too open, if you ask my therapist. But, I will draw the line *somewhere*. I mean, I'm not going to go into graphic detail about... anything truly personal or that could potentially hurt someone. No spilling classified government secrets. Ok, if I have any! But otherwise, I figure, life is too short to censor yourself. Unless, again, it's something *really* embarrassing. Or illegal. Or... you get the point.
So, how often will these "Stuff" episodes happen? Is there a schedule?
A schedule? Haha! That's a good one. My life is a chaotic free-for-all. So, no. Absolutely no schedule. I'll post when the urge strikes! When inspiration (or a caffeine-fueled rant) hits. When I feel the need to share my latest questionable decision with the world. Consider it a delightful surprise. A little bit of chaos in your otherwise organized days. Maybe. I'll try to be consistent...ish. But no promises. Prepare for the inconsistent nature of my posts. And try to enjoy the ride.
Are you going to talk about… people? Like, other people?
Oh, absolutely. People are the engine of everything, aren't they? If you're lucky, you might hear about my best friend, Sarah, a woman of infinite patience and the only person who can tolerate my baking disasters. Or my cat, Mittens, who judges me relentlessly from her fluffy perch. Or maybe even the random stranger who gave me the best piece of advice I ever received. Don't expect names to be named without permission though. And don't expect the most flattering descriptions. But people? Oh yes. People are part of the "Stuff," for sure.
So, is this like… a blog?
Hmmm. You know, that's probably the closest thing. I guess, yeah. *It's a blog*, but not a *regular* blog. It's a stream of consciousness, sometimes funny, usually overly-detailed, and often meandering. You've been warned. Think of it as a conversation with a slightly unhinged friend who overshares. It's a space for thoughts and feelings, and maybe, just maybe, a little bit of connection. So, buckle up, friend - it's going to be a wild ride.
What if I don't get it? What if I don't find any of this interesting?
That's perfectly fine! Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised. I'm an acquired taste. Think of it as a quirky snack. If it doesn't appeal to your palate, that's totally okay. No hard feelings. Go forth and explore! Find something that *does* spark your interest. Life's too short to force yourself to enjoy something you don't. I'm sure I won't be your cup of tea, but, who knows? You may get something out of it, or may just get a good laugh. Either way, good luck!
